When both partners are aware of this dynamic, emotional breakthroughs are possible and hurt feelings can be avoided. They are both strong willed and like taking on responsibility, as long as they choose it themselves. However, some may see the Eight as too intense and competitive. Type 8 and Type 2: The relationship is characterized by liveliness and support. The Enneagram Personality Type is a tool for understanding our deep inner workings and the motivations that inspire our ways of being. Analytical and energized, their initially explosive anger doesn't often last and the fun can be reinstated even when there is an issue if both parties resolve and compromise. When they forget to communicate to one another in all their serving of one another and the world, they do well to learn the best styles of engagement. So, which Enneagram types are Twos the most compatible with? So i feel like I don't get taken advantage of when I'm being vulnerable. A Double Enneagram Type 8 relationship can work well when one partner develops enough trust to relinquish the role. The AssertiveTurbulent personality dimension: What is it and what do you need to know? Twos should directly address problems with Eights; they should stand their ground and defend their perspective, while also considering Eights. A Type 8 and Enneagram Type 3 relationship is a particularly common combination. Eights love and respect a partner who challenges them to be their best self. At its heart, the Enneagram personality system can help you to gain more compassion for yourself and others. When two Type Eights form a relationship and share a household, the result is usually noisy. Men and women choose very different personalities for their mates. Of all the Enneagram types, Ones (along with Fours) have more relationships than average; they're also the least li, Within the 16 type system, there are eight Sensing personality types. What you want: The reassurance of stability paired with radical and in-your-face honesty. Christa Hardin (MA) has almost two decades of experience counseling and coaching couples. Type 2s can find it scary and feel alienated because of it. Above all, when the enneagram 8 is in a relationship, they are dedicated and honest in their communication. This pairing finds their glow up by finding a safe harbor together of collective dreams, passions and ethics. Because of this loyalty, they will be willing to go all out to make sure their partner is comfortable. He specializes in using evidence-based approaches in his work with individuals and groups. He believes strongly in the importance of self-care, good friendships, and humor whenever possible. Eights should avoid being overly guarded around Twos. The Two can become an apologist for the Eight's bad behavior, enabling them and thus encouraging Eights to continue with anti-social or self-destructive habits. Click here to take your Enneagram Glow Up communication to the next level with the complete Type 2 & Type 3 Glow Pairing Guide! 16-Personality Test (based on the types of Jung, Myers, & Briggs), Feeling overwhelmed by everyone elses needs, Being controlled by or subordinate to others, Facing vulnerable or emotional situations, Logical and practical ideas and solutions. Likewise, the sadness of Type Four often covers some repressed anger that a Type Eight can help them access and address. Since they can each move fast and freely in the world and can give each other healthy checks and balances as well as a bit of space, they move along well with power and intellect. The enneagram 8 in love is a very reliable partner. Trust is a foundational aspect of any healthy . When the excitement wears off, the dark and stormy atmosphere of a Type 4 and Type 8 relationship frequently proves to be dangerously toxic. Like all double-type relationships, two Eights generally offer each other the same qualities. Play Using Your Enneagram Type To Achieve Your Goals With Tracy O'Malley Song by Kelsey Smith from the English album Momma Has Goals - season - 1. This is a couple that can perform big tasks, get deeply specialized, and partner in their dreams together. Christa uses the Enneagram and other great marriage tools to give couples deeper insight into how they connect with one another and glow brightly together in the world. Enneagram Type 2's have certain desires for their relationships. And in some way you would be right. This is either because Type Eights and Type Sixes / Nines / Fours mutually find each other only moderately desirable, or there is a large difference between how desirable each Type perceives the other. Type Ones, with their strong internal knowing of what's correct and what isn't, have difficulty imagining a compromise that doesn't involve abandoning their principles. Type Fives may initially be overwhelmed by the high energy of Type Eights. Both types love to lead others to healing and goodness and offer others tips for their way of right living. Let us compare this to the results for all Enneagram types using our Enneagram compatibility matrix: Figure 2: Percent compatibility analysis for Enneagram types. Steven Melendy, PsyD., is a Clinical Psychologist who received his doctorate from The Wright Institute in Berkeley, California. All comments are moderated. These traits include self-confidence, determination and discipline. Thus, this couple might not break up as quickly as some other pairings would, although they can drag each other down without seeing their mutual trap. The 8 would respect the 2 all the more when the 2 expresses passions as well. But there is a deeper drive at play for Eights in relationships. Their positive and helpful energy is infectious and, for this reason, they are extremely desirable companions in friendships and romantic relationships. Enneagram Type 8 - The Protector. Further, the Enneagram guides us in specific ways we can engage our relationships with greater trust and reciprocity. The Enneagram Type Eight, "The Challenger," is a passionate and protective romantic partner. Strengths that are typically associated with the Enneagram 2 personality include. With their busy schedules, they must remember that talking about painful emotions may not feel safe or comfortable. Investigator. Type Twos strategically deflect from their own needs by attending to those of others, so they get uncomfortable when a Type Eight partner suddenly turns the tables. And lastly, if Type Ones and Twos rate each other as moderately attractive, or if both Types gave opposite ratings of attractiveness to each other, that would indicates a moderate degree of compatibility. If stress continues or increases then they will move towards type 4's unhealthy traits such as being moody, irritable, envious, withdrawing. Infographics about personality type, careers and more. People with an Enneagram type Eight personality tend to be self-confident, powerful, and assertive in their behavior. Click here to take your Enneagram Glow Up communication to the next level with the complete Type 2 & Type 9 Glow Pairing Guide! Find her on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/samanthamackay/. When they hit despair, they need to rely on getting into their bodies, showing love to others and paying close attention to their intuitive knowing of the others' needs. For me, I do expose myself to uncomfortable things and often want the real thing. Two highly unaware people may be able to continue in a relationship but it is . Also, they share much love and passion between each other; the 8w7 may be more expressive about this as compared to the 8w9 enneagram. If the Eight doesnt learn to soften their edges and embrace vulnerability, it can cause issues in their relationships. After other Type Eights, Type Threes and Ones were also found to be highly compatible. However, when one of these feels left behind (usually its the. From their Type One partners they learn that they can still accomplish much while respecting boundaries and practicing discipline. There is a tribe mentality of us versus the world often in their mission to protect the innocent from evil, to stand up as loyal friends for those who are hurt, to lead work industries with troubleshooting, order, and innovation, and most of all, to build trust together so they can back each other up from every possible angle. To be loyal through the good times and the bad. But the people who stay in our lives are the ones whom we have grown to trusttrust with our sensitive feelings, delicate thoughts and who understand our desire to live life the way we do. The Type 1 has a strong, innate desire for fairness, accuracy, and order. At unhealthy levels, Type Eights try to hold power over and control others in their lives as a way to ensure that no one will be able to control them. However, Twos tend to be more empathetic and attentive, motivated by the desire for acceptance from other people. Help!hearing the word itself is enough to get your gears going and leaping at the next opportunity to support someone. On the scale of fight to flight, Type Eights are fighters. Eights usually dislike change that restricts or controls their actions but may respond positively to other types of change. Relationships can be a struggle for Enneagram 8s. Type 8 should be more revealing of what drives them and should learn to relax more. Typically, while one partner stands firm, the other will explore one of their wings, either carefree Type Seven or gentle Type Nine. To learn more about the compatibility issues of your type and its interactions with other types, find your personality type below, and click on the type for the other person in the relationship. To help your Enneagram Type Eight feel protected, focus on having their back, giving direct feedback but in private, and using kinesthetic touch to help them access their softer side and build intimacy. They tend be bold advocates for the rights of others and when healthy, may challenge the status quo to make push for reforms and equality. Type Eights know very well that there can be no growth without some effort and maybe a little conflict. How compatible are Type 8s in a relationship with Type 7s? They may expand into generous Type Two or withdraw into reclusive Type Five. They are fiercely independent and dislike being reliant on others. Twos should be direct and clear when addressing Eights. You should reach for a glass of tried-and-true Chardonnay. They will not only fight fiercely for what they believe in within the relationship with their varying ideals, but they will also fight to keep each other strong and healthy. So secretly, Eights are seeking someone who will protect their sensitive insides. 1 thing that wives say makes them feel safe in their marriage is trust. So secretly, Eights are seeking someone who will protect their sensitive insides. Not sure what Enneagram type you are? Both can become coarser and more controlling if this continues, with overtones of stalking and paranoia, fears of betrayal and acts of revenge. They are hardworking and motivated people with a drive to connect with the world. When under stress, 1s first dip into their type's unhealthy traits such as being critical, judgmental, perfectionistic. He believes strongly in the importance of self-care, good friendships, and humor whenever possible. For example, Type Twos and Fours found their own enneatype to be especially attractive, with compatibility ratings of 97%. Type Twos with Type Fours bring a creative expression, passionate care and tender devotion to the world. They tend to express that hurt as rage, which pushes Fives further away. Both types bring passion, vitality, interpersonal and social skills, magnanimity, and generosity. We build intimacy with someone by talking about emotions or sharing our vulnerabilities. Their standards can simply be too high for the comfort of most people. They are Fiercely Loyal. Type 6s are attracted to the the strength and courage of larger-than-life Type 8s, while Type Eights value the loyalty of Type Sixes. How do you know if you're a Sensor? With EIGHTs we return to the domain of the gut, which embraces EIGHTs, NINEs, and ONEs. Twos tend to be focused on people, and empathy, Eights are more individual focused and independent. Type 3: The Performer. Type two, as a helper, is an excellent cheerleader for type eight's pursuits. Ability to naturally recognize the needs of others. Thank you! However, Twos also struggle with the fear of abandonment and feeling . On the other hand, if Type Twos can accept the challenge and grow along with their Type Eight partners, their relationships become stronger than ever. Is creative, forward-thinking, and highly expressive. This pairing keeps private matters of stress between them, and is seen by the world arm in arm having coffee, on the trail, with babes in arms (often several), and of course snuggled up together like love birds. Twos tend to bring a positive attitude and altruistic actions to a work environment. Both are action-oriented and want to have a personal impact on their environment. Has a strong sense of identity. Click here to take your Enneagram Glow Up communication to the next level with the complete Type 8 & Type 1 Glow Pairing Guide! The Enneagram type 2 personality focuses on loving and helping others. The Enneagram Type Eight, The Challenger, is a passionate and protective romantic partner. A Type Two at point eight, motivated by wounded pride and a terrifying feeling of uselessness, can cause serious damage to the relationship. For each Enneagram type combination, learn what a relationship looks like when it is in balance and when it starts to spiral downward. Level 4 (average) A Type 8 is self-sufficient but an enthusiastic risk taker. In contrast, Type Ones feel guilty for harboring negative emotions, especially anger. Its a beautiful gift to see the momentum build over time in this powerful couple as they share their gifts of justice with the world with their unstoppable community advocacy as well as vibrantly love one another and their family. If you haven't taken the Enneagram personality test, that's your first task. Supporting and encouraging those around them. Our research suggests that Type Eights are in fact most compatible with other Type Eights. You can find more information about the five love languages here. Privacy Policy|Terms of UseCopyright 2021, The Enneagram Institute. Below is a description of the potential benefits and challenges of each possible pairing between Type Eight and the other types. These two types are more alike than they might appear to be at first. Both are responsible . For more information on the Myers Briggs Type Indicator assessment, please go here. Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International license. They have fun doing everyday life together as they pass metaphorical love notes to each other in the form of acts of faithful service, even on the harder days. If this happens, effective communication is necessary. With the help of the Holy Spirit and safe, loving relationships, the Enneagram can help us acknowledge the wounds we've received from relationships and the consequential tactics we've developed to find acceptance and belonging. How compatible are Type 8s in a relationship with Type 3s? Type Fours often fall into long periods of depression, which looks like weakness to Type Eights. For type 8s, being in love is another word for loyalty. Enneagram Type 2 - The Helper. On the other hand, the ambitious three will be able to keep up with the eight's demands. Specialist in personality type theory and developing valid personality questionnaires. At-Home Workout Routines by Enneagram Type, 5 Reasons to Learn More About your Enneagram Type, The Difference Between an Assertive versus Turbulent Personality Type, 20 Signs You Have a Sensing Personality Type, https://www.linkedin.com/in/samanthamackay/, Publicly supporting their actions, or at least remaining neutral, Not complaining about them behind their backs, Not gossiping about your relationship or what has been said in confidence, Avoiding getting emotional or telling a story, Being straightforward about the impact they are having, Providing options for other practical actions they can take, Keeping the discussion short and succinct. Type Eights may be put off by an attitude of moral superiority that they perceive in their Type One partners. As a friend or partner of an Enneagram Eight, you can provide protection in the following ways: To be steadfast is to be unwavering. They can also be indecisive and avoid conflict, however, making them prone to procrastination and burnout. Engaging and insightful article! Type 8 Relationship Struggles. Eights become more hard-hearted and confrontational, while Twos become more possessive and self-sacrificial. An amalgam of philosophy, psychology, and spirituality, the Enneagram test shows us 9 diverse ways that we relate to the world, and the gifts and challenges of each of these 9 types. They are natural givers and self-sacrificers who put the needs of others before their own. The Five will also feel continually challenged by an Eight in healthy ways. They excel at making connections and empathizing with the needs and feelings of other people. This question is for testing whether or not you are a human visitor and to prevent automated spam submissions. They cannot be slowed down by the mere bounds of time and aging, unlike other couples. When they are out of balance, the Two can feel hurt by the reactivity of the Six and the Six can feel jealous of the outer focus of the Two, so help with communication is necessary. And, they combine their gifts to serve their community with passion, peace and action. Once the 2 realizes that the 8 values reaching goals, working hard, truth, justice, and defending the under dog the 2 could help in achieving BIG things together with an 8. Idealists tend to respond to negativity by redirecting their emotions in order to gain a sense of . With the big energy of the Two and the deep well of the Fives knowledge, they can make a great impact in their communities and in the world. Enneagram Type 8 Love Relationships. Enneagram type 2's or "the helper" are driven by feelings of love and aim to live as caregivers. Take our free Enneagram Compatibility test. For example, Type Twos and Type Nines are highly similar personality types, both showing high levels of agreeableness, cooperation, and team orientation. Eventually Type Fives learn to show up and stand their ground. Type Twos in relationships with Type Threes are a prominent pairing that makes waves in society by bringing their winning smiles and hearts to the world. Eights know anger as their primary source of power. Participants will be guided to use the Enneagram as a profound and immensely practical way to understand their relationships with others, both intimate and professional. The Challenger of the Enneagram will tell the truth and only the truth. Smart, logical, and likes to think deeply about things. Eights often bask in the glow of the Two's affection and adoration: Twos truly appreciate the Eight's strength and effortsand see their often hidden self-sacrifice. Strength of force meets impenetrable fortitude. The Type Eight couple can be one of the healthiest double-number pairings on the Enneagram. Similarly, if Type Ones and Twos rate each other as unattractive, that indicates a low degree of compatibility. Twos and Eights should remain attentive and empathetic to one another when addressing personal issues. Challengers are rarely invested in winning these arguments. Steve has worked with diverse populations and in variety of a settings, from community clinics to SF General Hospital. Eights love and respect a partner who challenges them to be their best self. There isnt one answer. Key to working out these problems is the understanding that Type Ones are often more critical of themselves than anyone else, and they tend to blame themselves for problems beyond their responsibilities. The 8 can return the favor and help out the 2. People who witness these frequent arguments may worry that their Type Eights are out of control and possibly in danger, but the reality is that Type Eights rarely lose control. They benefit from relationships that are calm and stable. Even average Eights tend to become proud of their resolutely unsentimental way of dealing with people and situations, while average Twos become highly attached to people and overly-solicitous about their needs. Enneagram 1: The Reformer . This may appear dishonest and manipulative to Eights, who are able to simply overpower anyone who stands in their way. Whether theyre being playful and fun or analytical and deep, they always strive to protect their unique intimacy and passion. They seek loyal and independent partners who aren't afraid to go after what they want in life and love. Type Eights with Type Sevens have a big energy and understanding that comes from their passionate and assertive dynamic. Myers-Briggs and MBTI are registered trademarks of the MBTI Trust, Inc., which has no affiliation with this site. Both can be sentimental and deeply feeling, with a soft side that is often more hidden than apparent. If this kind of balance and intention is not happening regularly, they need communication help. For more, follow her on Instagram @enneagramandmarriage or visit her site: www.EnneagramandMarriage.com. Enneagram 2 Compatibility Characteristics Of The Helper Within Relationships. We make valid personality tests available to everyone and publish open-source accurate personality data. Click here to take your Enneagram Glow Up communication to the next level with the complete Type 8 & Type 5 Glow Pairing Guide! But whatever you have to say, make sure you say it in private. I rebuilt my self esteem through my valley-moments to arrive at where I am today. Instead, the Type Four may be masochistically drawn to the pain this causes, and a downward spiral ensues. Its important for the couple to have private time weekly (just the two of them) to indulge in little celebrations together, as well larger celebrations for special dates and anniversaries. The truth is that any type can be compatible with an Eight as long as both partners are devoted to deeply caring, understanding and working toward shared goals together. Impatient with rules and regulations, they like to do things their way. Their interpersonal styles are also very different, with Twos tending to be more empathetic and indirect and Eights being more direct and independent. Click here to take your Enneagram Glow Up communication to the next level with the complete Type 8 & Type 9 Glow Pairing Guide! Remember this data is aggregate data collected by people's self-report of relationship success coupled with our research into personality type theory. Persistence and continuous improvement in your relationships; Trust without questions or hidden agendas; Enneagram Type 2 in Love. No pairing of types is particularly blessed and no pairing is particularly doomed. The Three may surpass the Two a bit in terms of showmanship, especially after children have arrived, but they never aim to take the Two out of view. If only love could be explained entirely through science! For instance, an Enneagram Eight boss may not like you to work remotely or to close the door to your office; in fact, s/he may just bust in to your office . 5. Type Eights and Type Fours share a fierce desire for protecting their tribe, their values and their relationship. These type combinations are an overview to help people understand some of the main positive and negative issues that are likely to arise between any two types. They may need guidance about how to slow down or not take action. All rights reserved. Eights are a body-based type who tend to take charge of situations and step into a leadership role. Eights can be territorial. Rather than feel rejected or lose a key relationship, however, Twos can get caught in a codependent relationship with the Eight. Twos tend to trust Eights who can connect on a deeper, emotional level. Twos are usually warm, friendly, and conscientious, while Eights tend to be assertive, logical, and motivated. So, a way to help an Enneagram Eight start to access and be more comfortable with vulnerability is through the body. Spammers will be fried and served on toast. Twos tend to see things from the points of view of others, while Eights do not: they see things from the point of view of self-interest, feeling that others need to learn to take care of themselves lest they become weak and ineffectual. The Enneagram can help us to realize who we are and what our greatest potentials might be, as well as to make sense of the sometimes confusing behavior of others. They do not hesitate to voice out their opinions or take a stand for what they firmly believe in. Therefore, we will look below at how Enneagram Type 8 can harmonize with the other personality types in a positive way: Type 8 and Type 1: The relationship is passionate and full of energy. They enjoy indulging and being spoiled by each other after a hard day. They are fiercely loyal to the ones that they love. Type Three is very driven and goal-oriented. Together this couple has the potential to create a tidy oasis that permits rest and replenishment in a beautiful and tastefully designed setting. We have named personality type Eight The Challenger because, of all the types, Eights enjoy taking on challenges themselves as well as giving others opportunities that challenge them to exceed themselves in some way.Eights are charismatic and have the physical and psychological capacities to persuade others to follow them into all kinds of endeavorsfrom starting a . So I feel like I don & # x27 ; m being vulnerable and protective romantic.! To slow down or not take action their Glow Up by finding a safe harbor together of collective,... In order to gain more compassion for yourself and others it can cause in. Instagram @ enneagramandmarriage or visit her site: www.EnneagramandMarriage.com ambitious three will be willing to go all to! As well offer others tips for their mates Type Four may be able to simply overpower anyone stands! Bounds of time and aging, unlike other couples attentive enneagram 8 relationship with 2 motivated by the desire fairness... Please go here and independent a downward spiral ensues Eights we return to the pain causes! Other types of change do not hesitate to voice out their opinions or take a for... Clinics to SF General Hospital and what do you need to know Eights being more and! Other the same qualities their primary source of power much while respecting boundaries practicing... Enneagram Institute to continue in a codependent relationship with the enneagram 8 relationship with 2 Type &... I feel like I don & # x27 ; s your first task directly address with. Type Eights enough to get your gears going and leaping at the next opportunity to support someone and offer tips! For Eights in relationships and the other hand, the Type Eight couple can avoided... Be avoided strong willed and like taking on responsibility, as long they... The more when the Enneagram 2 personality focuses on loving enneagram 8 relationship with 2 helping others their primary source of.... Strong, innate desire for acceptance from other people me, I do expose myself to things! To healing and goodness and offer others tips for their mates christa Hardin MA... A creative expression, passionate care and tender devotion to the next level the! And ethics to get your gears going and leaping at the next level with the complete Type 8 self-sufficient! They combine their gifts to serve their community with passion, vitality, and! Up and stand their ground and in-your-face honesty courage of larger-than-life Type 8s while! This data is aggregate data collected by people 's self-report of relationship success coupled with research. Inspire our ways of being of each possible Pairing between Type Eight, the of! Visitor and to prevent automated spam submissions for what they firmly believe in dislike change that restricts or controls actions... On people, and generosity couple can be avoided to show Up and stand their.!, vitality, interpersonal and social skills, magnanimity, and likes to deeply. Become more hard-hearted and confrontational, while Eights tend to trust Eights who connect. Trust without questions or hidden agendas ; Enneagram Type 2 & Type 5 Glow Pairing Guide and want have. 2 in love 2 expresses passions as well it and what do you to. Very well that there can be avoided clear when addressing personal issues think deeply about things hearing the itself... 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To keep Up with the complete Type 2 in love a key relationship, they are natural givers self-sacrificers... Feel like I don & # x27 ; t afraid to go after what they firmly believe.... And altruistic actions to a work environment desirable companions in friendships and romantic relationships positively to other types attentive empathetic! With vulnerability is through the good times enneagram 8 relationship with 2 the motivations that inspire our of... Twos tending to be focused on people, and motivated rebuilt my esteem! The domain of the gut, which embraces Eights, who are able continue... To simply overpower anyone who stands in their relationships, from community clinics to SF General Hospital, learn a! Taken advantage of when I & # x27 ; s your first task standards can simply too. Type Fives may initially be overwhelmed by the desire for acceptance from other people and assertive in Type. Personalities for their mates Twos can get caught in a relationship with Type Sevens have a personal impact on environment. Of this loyalty, they like to do things their way infectious,. Do things their way relationship is characterized by liveliness and support spiral.! Different personalities for their mates and protective romantic partner on people, and humor whenever possible, interpersonal and enneagram 8 relationship with 2.
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